Discord Servers

Myself and some other authors have created a Discord server to establish an encouraging space for the often-overlooked authors of the YBF fandom. We may be writing for our own self-indulgent desires, but we still want validation!To join, you must:

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A public server for all YBF fans!
Age verification is REQUIRED.

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In April 2022, I was publicly accused of grooming an adult woman with the intent to allow my husband to rape her. This page is dedicated to addressing those accusations for those that are curious enough to actually learn more "About Me" instead of believing whatever they read on the internet.

Update 09/24/2023He's not my husband anymore. Leave me alone.Caps are in chronological order. I'm not taking questions. I'm never speaking about this publicly ever again.I met Leslie (AKA "Mars", “SigurdArt”, "Daoko", "Madame_Seal", "Bea") in an adults-only fandom space in Sept 2021. I had just turned 27; she was 20. She was complaining about how hard it was to lose her virginity there, in a public channel. I offered to let her sleep with my husband, Mason, since we had been discussing opening our relationship again, but I did not pressure her. She politely declined and I did not pursue the topic.Leslie and I became friends through our mutual love for the fandom. She encouraged me to start drawing and taught me tips and tricks. She was an established artist in the fandom and had 10k followers on Twitter; I had fewer than 500. She was fun and sweet, and ended up being someone I confided in a lot. I never really had girl friends because of my anxiety and self esteem issues. She helped me feel less alone during a time when I quit my job because it was so emotionally taxing.She was like a sister to me. I gave her sisterly advice when it came to her attempts to have casual sex with randos on Tinder because I, too, spent a lot of time on Tinder in my early 20's. She was going to sleep with a man that said he 'didn't wear condoms' and made her buy Plan B. So, yeah, I gave her advice to not sleep with that guy and the many others that threw up hella red flags.After enough failed attempts at Tinder, she decided she would give my offer a chance. She joined a group chat with myself and my husband after she decided to come see us that November. They also shared DMs that I never saw until after she accused me.Leslie turned 21 on Nov 14.She drove from NC to IN and stayed with us Nov 21-23. I believe she told her parents she was going to visit family she had in Ohio, which should have been a red flag in itself.Before Mason got home on the 21st, Leslie told me that she has endometriosis and she made me promise not to tell Mason because she didn’t want him to treat her any differently. Obviously, this was another red flag that I blindly ignored. I was present when Mason slept with her because of my concern for her safety, but I did not participate. We taught her the red/yellow/green light system. We taught her to communicate with us. We asked what she wanted to try. We asked her to set her boundaries.Things went as well as they could. It took a while. She yellow-carded, but green-ed again. She bled. I mentioned to a friend that it was interesting to see what sex with a virgin was like since I didn’t lose my virginity in a very traditional way. As an author, it’s interesting to see what fanfic gets right and wrong. I haven’t written a virgin scene since then, and I don’t plan to. It brings up bad memories.Mason woke her up with sex before he went to work the next day, something they discussed about a week beforehand in DMs. She was uncomfortable because of the bleeding from the night prior, and she even told Mason to stop. I remember it very vividly: “Stop,” she said. “Oh, sorry,” he said. “Okay, keep going,” she said. “Are you sure?” he said. “Yes,” she said. I remember because I didn’t know how to feel about it. It’s certainly an unsettling experience to listen to your husband sleep with another girl only ten feet away. She was very loudly enthusiastic. I’m sure my neighbors could attest. She thanked him after and called him a good boy.Leslie had mentioned at some point in her posts about me that she had felt scared about being in a town hours away from her own home, and felt like she couldn't leave, but we were never stopping her from leaving. That's not victim blaming; it is a fact. She even mentioned that she may leave early to go see her family in Ohio, and we were okay with that. I assumed that was just an alibi she was using in case she was too scared to tell us the truth. It's what I would have done. I've driven hours to get dick from friends I met online only to have it be the worst experience ever. I would never want to let that happen to anyone else, so I tried to check in with her. I sat down with her on the first morning after hearing that she was still sore from the first time, and talked with her about her experience. (Mason had to leave for work, but she still needed aftercare.) I told her that she didn’t have to keep having sex with him. I told her she could just sleep over like a friend, or even leave if she wanted. She declined.They went on to have sex a few more times before we got drunk. I took Leslie to the grocery store on the 22nd and she bought alcohol of her own volition, with her own money. She was very excited to drink it. I was very depressed and took some depression naps while she was there. She began drinking on the last day, the 23rd, while Mason was still at work and I was napping. I woke up and she was already tipsy. She was talking to some mutual friends about wanting to get fucked later, and she bragged to those friends after she left about the good time she had.I began drinking with her. Mason got home and she tried to get him to drink, too, but he could not since he took an on-call rotation for his job (before Leslie decided to see us). She was very persistent about it despite Mason telling her no, but she was pretty drunk. We both got kind of messed up. She kissed me for the first time that night. And yes, she kissed me. I think she asked, but I’m not sure. I just remember being too scared to do anything despite being drunk. After we kissed, I felt the anxiety kind of crumble. I said fuck it, we’re already naked, I’ll just do this. Alcohol really is liquid courage.I don’t remember much after the kiss, but there was a threesome, pizza, and a movie after.She left the morning after. Things were fun for the next few weeks. She was planning on coming to see us again. I was still coming to terms with my husband wanting to be polyamorous. I didn’t pursue anything sexual with her; again, she was like a sister to me. She wanted to get Mason and I Christmas gifts. She was planning to see us after Christmas.Then she said she didn’t like talking to Mason anymore.I said, “Oh.”I was concerned, but she just wrote him off as being too clingy. He was really clingy, so I understood where she was coming from.On December 16, 2021, a month after she left, she sent me a text message detailing that she did not give consent for the instance in which Mason woke her up with sex.I was shocked. Incredulous. Betrayed. Horrified.How would you react when someone accuses your husband of 4 years of raping them? Let alone someone you thought of as your own sister?I believed her at face value because hey, believe all victims, right?I was trying to process it. I vacillated between “there's no way he would ever do something like that” and “Leslie wouldn't lie to me about this.” I had caught him having an emotional affair with another woman the day before, so my trust in him had been fractured even further.My “friends,” a group of mutual friends on Discord, were trying to have an intervention with me, basically screaming at me to leave him and go to a women’s shelter. A women's shelter! This was an hour after Leslie dropped the bomb on me.I drove to my parents’ house before Mason got home from work. I didn’t want to talk to him, and my "friends" told me not to. I knew it would be too much for me to handle. While I was there, I changed my mind. I texted him. I told him, “I’m staying at my parents’ house and I'm leaving you.”I chewed him out over text for hurting my friend. I was so hurt and betrayed. I was scared to answer his calls.When I finally calmed down and he did talk to me, he told me that she never said stop. He told me that they discussed a bunch of stuff in DMs, stuff I didn’t know about until he sent me conversations.Leslie's story wasn't adding up.We haven't spoken since that night. I never found out why she accused him, but she did. My best guess is that she got hurt because of a condition she wanted me to keep secret, didn't tell us she got hurt despite asking her to communicate with us at every turn, and then felt 'grossed out' by having slept with him after he was caught having an emotional affair and so she regretted it. I think that when she complained about him to other people, they told her that she was raped without having been there themselves. This is all, of course, conjecture.Leslie retroactively revoked her consent, which is not how consent works. She was enthusiastic and unpressured during all sexual activity. She felt comfortable enough to get drunk around us and fully expected to have sex while she was drunk. She didn’t set appropriate boundaries with us despite being given ample opportunity to do so.She told me to fuck off after the allegation in December, so I did. I asked my mutual friends if she was okay because I was really concerned about her. I didn’t want our friendship to end. In the end, they all believed her over me, so I lost my entire friend group.She posted about her “sexual assault” on Twitter in April 2022, before ever going to the police. She came across a tweet in which I was being verbally abused because I had a disagreement with a member of the Writer’s Guild I created with my friends. Leslie reached out to that person about me. A couple days later, she posted her callout. It couldn’t be coincidence. They used Leslie for their personal vendetta against me.She called me a groomer, and my husband a rapist. I contacted several lawyers. I paid hundreds of dollars. People started talking about wanting to come to my house and kill me, people I had never even spoken to. I slept with a gun next to my nightstand. Can you imagine the terror of being afraid for your life in your own home?A county detective reached out to us for questioning. I said fuck off, like my lawyer told me.If you've seen them, the screenshots that Leslie posted show nothing but me trying to come to terms with the fact that my best friend told me that my husband raped her just a few hours before. They also show my husband being a fucking dick, but that’s not illegal. I said some shitty things that night because I was thinking out loud, trying to rationalize why my husband would have done something he absolutely despises. When you learn information that shatters your world view, you're going to make excuses for why that information is wrong.I'm not a 'rape apologist.' Rape is a heinous crime that I would never wish upon my worst enemies. Defending my husband from a false accusation does not make me an apologist.The detective has shelved her case for months because there’s no evidence that points to anything illegal and there never was.Our age difference of six years is negligible; she is and was a consenting adult. Saying that I groomed a 21 year old abled woman to be raped by my husband with no power/money/fame imbalance is far-reaching at best and insulting to real grooming victims at worst. If I was grooming women in a discord server, don’t you think at least one or two would have come forward by now, emboldened by the cancel crusade against me? Why is it just an ex? Why aren't the other admins kicking me out of the server? I posted a photo of my husband's penis in the server once because it was relevant to the conversation, in a server dedicated to writing pornographic fanfiction, and I heavily spoilered it. I just wanted to show him off because I liked my husband.I have been harassed for nearly a whole year now. People have not only accused me of a slew of horrendous crimes that have only gotten progressively worse as the game of telephone goes on, but they also publicly called me ugly, made fun of my appearance, called me ‘slovenly’ as some thinly veiled euphemism for fat, insulted my writing, my art—all things that are really just below the belt.They call me a cyber bully. I made one post about a staunch anti-Fuboo creator that had been tracing over Fuboo’s art for money. I posted evidence of tracing in the form of videos and overlays of images. She never addressed the concerns publicly. Didn’t even deny them. She did, however, have a public meltdown over Twitter. I realized that I was just as bad as my own harassers. I didn't do it because she was doing something wrong, I did it because I wanted to hurt someone the same way I had been hurt in some grand, cosmic "what comes around goes around," but she’s literally just a kid. I took the posts down after 2-3 days, and I offered her a sincere apology. Two wrongs don’t make a right. She left Twitter for a while and came back stating that she had tried committing suicide twice, and that I was to blame. I hope I don't need to elaborate further on how fucked up that is.I’ll admit that I haven’t been the nicest over the past year. Yeah, I made some jokes that were in bad taste, but it was all I had. I made jokes about the awful things complete strangers said about me and my friends. Making fun of your bullies is all you really can do, right? I never interacted with them publicly. The only time I did slip up and made a public shitty jab about someone was after that person started talking shit about one of my friends. It’s easier to handle the harassment when it’s directed at me, but when you come for my friends just for supporting me through all this bullshit, I… I saw red. Not my best moment.All this harassment—people I look up to calling me horrible things that just aren’t true, artists I’ve always wanted to compliment blocking me just because of someone telling them to—wouldn’t you slip up, too? It’s hard to take the high road when people keep slinging mud at me and taunting me to get dirty.I block everyone that blocks me on Twitter to make sure that they don’t ever have to see anything I post ever again. That’s what they want, right? So weird when they get huffy when I block them back. Will I ever unblock them? Nope. I don't want children interacting with me.Look, I’m trying to crawl out of my depression. I’m trying to make a new life. My husband and I couldn’t work out our differences. We’ve been separated since November 2022. I want to interact with a fandom that makes me happy despite all the trauma it has brought me. I just want to create.This is my statement, and it's been a long time coming. I was there, too. I saw and heard everything, and this was my best recollection. You don’t have to believe me, and if you do believe me, I don't want you to harass or condemn Leslie for what she did. I just hope I've thrown enough doubt in your mind to drop it, let the authorities handle it, and respect when the report will ultimately be dismissed. Remember that Twitter is not justice, and it's fake public accusations like these that make it harder for real victims to receive justice.Leave me and my friends alone. It’s been long enough, don't you think? Focus on something you enjoy. I know I will.-Wicked

FAQWho are you?
I'm Wicked. Nice to meet you!What are your pronouns?
She/her! I'd prefer if you not use they/them, thank you.What fandoms are you in?
Currently Your Boyfriend, but I've also been in Undertale.Can I draw/write about your OC(s)?
Go for it. I couldn't stop you if I tried!What kind of content can I find in your art/writing?
I write about what appeals to me most. Trauma kinks are at the front and center of the majority of my works lately.For muting purposes, I always try to tag the following subjects in my tweets:
-Rape
-Abuse
-Gore/Guro
-Pregnancy/Forced pregnancy
-Underage
-Incest
I will never censor these words (i.e. r@pe, !ncest, etc) to keep your word mutes functional! I'm into a lot of things that a lot of people aren't, but that's why we block words.Are you a pro-shipper?
Yup!Do you endorse those topics?
What?Do you think people should reenact the things you write/draw about?
What???Do you—
No. Go touch some grass.Do you take commissions?
Not currently!Do you take art/fic trades?
Not currently!When will you update [fic]?
When I feel like it. :)What's your relation to The_Fuboo?
Uh, null? I've never said a word to her in my life. People think I'm like her best friend or something—if anything, I'm more like the thorn in her side. I don't work for her, either.What's your relation to PaniikoArt?
She's my actual wife and I love her.I heard you were kind of mean. Are you?
Depends on who you ask.I heard--
Yeah, I'm sure you did.Well?
Well, what?Aren't you gonna say anything about it?
About what?You know?...
I don't....
???Well, uh... what's with your piss kink?
It's a running gag. I'm not actually that into watersports, but my friends still poke fun at me for it.I have a question that you didn't answer here on this page.
You can ask anonymously on my CuriousCat if it's open. :)